PROGRESS rather than Perfection :-)

After that horrible session of a bottle of Muscat washed down with a bottle of Red Wine, I had another drink, a bottle of Port, 14 days later.

I am well into SMART now and have used the tools, particularly the Cost Benefit Analysis (CBA) with very compelling results.

The sticking point with AA was giving my life and my will over to my higher power.

I can accept that as a notion of letting go, relaxation or meditation. But I cannot accept that there is a salient being out there that can cause things to happen in my life.

Everything will occur in my life and I have the opportunity to make what I can out of it - meaning exists because I cause things to have meaning. Usually, without purpose.

The SMART Recovery tools are best used every day and that is what I will do.

AA has some lovely people in it and it is incredibly supportive. It helped me to get 134 days up - without it I struggled hugely.

I think the combination of AA and SMART will work for me best.